Good afternoon.
There are things I could tell you about ITN which would shock you - like the fact that a Grand Man who rejoices in the title of Editor in Chief queues for his own tea and is doing that very thing, right now. There are other things I could tell you but they are secret and I would be fired for sharing them. Or I could tell you and then I'd have to kill you, as they say in the movies. So imagine I wrote them all down and gave them to a dispatch rider to take them to ITV Production's HQ on the South Bank, and the courier dropped them out of his satchel to be found by a complete stranger in the street?
I'd be furious, as would the people the delicate information related to. You will be amazed, therefore, if you tune in at 6 when we have a story much the same as that but the "stories" were intimate test results of patients, including tests for HIV and cancer, and that two of our top hospitals were at either end of the journey. Glen is your messenger and he won't drop a thing, not even an "h".
Unlike Mayor Ken - 'oo 'as been known to drop an "h" or two, depending on his mood - which by the way was pretty black when confronted by Boris "clipped vowels" Johnson in a Mayoral debate for ITV last night. It is shown in all it's gory glory rather late tonight but Harris has a sneak preview for you at 6.
We also have a sneak preview of Sweeney Todd the movie, live from Leicester Square as Johnny Depp treads the red carpet in celebration of the film's premiere. Tom Hanks last night, Depp tonight: the other programmes must eat their hearts out. And we do it all for you.
Surf's up in the east end : whether that means meteorologist-reporter Chrissie in a wet suit or not, I don't know but I'll be watching - very closely indeed, as should you be.
Faye, a Goddess in black today, was confronted by a madman at the weekend who destroyed her wing mirror. Her delightful husband and she stood their ground and all is now resolved. But it cost the assailant a pretty sum in damages and a wigging from the boys in blue. Just a warning incase you come across this vision of elfin delicacy: she's got a bite on her, too.
Remember that when you watch the show tonight: she produced it, she is responsible for it and if you DON'T like it, she'll be after you.
I only mention it for your own safety.
I only mention it for your own safety.
Alastair & Katie
