Good afternoon.
Well that's a lie, for a start: it is raining.
So, allow us to take you away from all that in what is the final lap before a bank holiday weekend that threatens to be summer, all crammed into 72 hours.
Peter, Paul and Mary: a curious musical combo from way back when - actually the 50s and 60s I think - sang of "Leaving on a jet 'plane". They also sang about the now seriously politically incorrect "Puff, the Magic Dragon" so we'll have none of that.
Nor jet 'planes, come to that: but we have got pretty well every other form of transport trundling into our news agenda.
Well, rather than 'trundling', potentially grinding to a halt, for starters: the tube network. Maintainance staff, who keep the tube running safely and smoothly want to do neither for 72 hours to demonstrate their disquiet at receiving no guarantees from the now bankrupt and pretty well defunct Metronet that none will lose their jobs, their pensions nor have an iota of their working conditions impinged upon by this half billion pound collapse. Right. Piers is the man clutching the potentially redundant Oyster Card and explains why events in Whitechapel might just have helped their case. Falling masonry, he cried.
Next Liz, a woman I 've always thought of as a very womanly woman, has decided she wants to be a pilot - a ship's pilot, so relax if you feared I was reneging on one of my Peter, Paul and Mary pledges!.
She has a high old time in the simulator but wait until she gets a go with the real thing. Anchors away - well away, if I were you. She's just told me she told the instructor she can't even parallel park a car. And you'll love the explanation from the pilot of what was at stake when she muddled her port with her starboard"!
There's nothing worse than someone peeing in your back garden. Well, there is but let's settle for a lavatorial statute of limitations on this one. If your garden is at the end of a Bus route and the driver is in need, your flora bunda may get an unwelcome boost of uric acid which Titchmarsh himself tells me is no good for anything except dandelions. The drivers want portaloos or something like that and the gardeners are with them. Phil is flushed with his own success with this one.
We also talk to the bus driver who I am sure would no more pee in a garden than drive his car in a bus lane. He is a hero, a man of honour and our sort of guy. Hear why from the father who owes him a huge amount in what could have been a life and death challenge. Marcus will ring the bell when everyone's ready to start.
Finally, Ashley Walters became a pop star who became part of So Solid Crew who became Asher D who did some bad stuff who did time who saw the error of his ways who became a movie star. Sweet.
Sugarhouse sweet, in fact. Great guy (now!) and a great movie: he joins us live.
So, back to the packing and planning for the Bank Holiday but take a tea break with us at 6 and your spirits will soar. Unless you liked Puff The Magic Dragon who, to be fair, did live by the sea and did frolic.... enough!
There's work to do.
Alastair & Katie.
