Our capital plumbed new depths at the weekend with four murders in two days: to put it in context, there were 8 murders in the whole of the UK at the weekend and we got half of them.
Full reports, particularly on the brutal events in Beckenham which prompted one witness to tell Marcus it was like listening to a pack of "baying animals"; and from Kingston where the events unfolded at the Volts nightclub.
We'll also be talking to the top-cop in charge of the Met's Special Crime unit.
After that, you'll need some lightening up... if not lighting up which, to a greater or lesser extent, will be nearly illegal in London come July 1st. ( I am fuming which is something I'll be doing less of, come July 1st!).
Bingo players count your blessings and bingo hall managers will find their place in smokers' heaven: a balcony will permit those hooked on housey-housey to continue their twin dodgy habits in peace; but there's a twist to the tale of two fat ladies and ducks in a row... Phil "Eyes down looking" Bayles has the story.
Imagine living in Camberley and hearing the drone of an annoying helicopter overhead: not unusual in that military neck-of-the-woods. But "knock knock" on the door, perhaps less common. Open the door and, knock me down with a feather, you are confronted with the face of one of the least likely diamond-divas you might have expected to drop by. And, as for her request, well I am too embarrassed to tell: it all happened to Mrs Amazed of Camberley who tells all to Damian Steward.
You can have too much of Harry Potter, we all agreed at our planning meeting: Daniel Radcliffe - cute, bare-chested in Equus in the West End but those spectacles and the post-punk mop of hair! Enuff. However, it seems he's been snogging so he may just have become slightly more interesting. I am not convinced but Steve Hargrave has been to investigate.
And Va va voom - the latest on the reason for weeping in the streets of Highbury and of giggly disinterest at Stamford Bridge and White Hart Lane.
Katie's working on the Crimewave story but joins me in urging you to be with us at 6.