Good afternoon and welcome to the Friday blog.
To be frank, it is proving just a little hard to get much work done. To the chaps, he is a sort of bad-boy-done-good hero and to most of the women he is just pretty hunky. And he is on the show tonight.
I'll tell you who in a moment and not a word of a lie.
Imagine I was to tell you that a finance director, with a history of fraud, had landed a job as finance director of a marketing company only to skim hundreds of thousands from them, ostentatiously buying several Porsche cars and a fabulous kitchen she even got featured in a coffee table glossy. You wouldn't believe me.
If I told you an entire army of American's, built like proverbial outdoor facilities, along with another army of rather elegant pom-pom juggling beauties in tow, had come to London to play grid-iron football you'd probably think I was guilty of another porky.
And if I told you Salma had yet again won our fiercely fought contest to present the unique and iconic fest that is What Not to Miss you - well, you might think it inconceivable that that could be true.
But all the above are absolutely de facto.
And Christian Slater, for it is he, is going to be in the studio.
So there's a treat for one and all.
Also tonight, James will review Sicko in which Michael Moore, of Bowling for Columbine and Fahrenheit 9/11 fame, says the American health service is killing more people than it is curing, all in the name of profit.
Plus he looks at the chilling Eastern Promises which is about Russian mafia types and I can't wait to see it. Or they'll break my fingers.
They told me to write this. Not the fingers bit but the "I can't wait to see it " bit. There, I've said it. Be frightened. I am frightened.
As you all might be when Chrissie is taught to moon-walk by the guy who taught Michael Jackson to moon-walk.
Blood on the dance floor or a thriller? You'll have to be there to judge. Sorry Michael, bad memories: I should have said decide instead of judge.
As you all will have to over your choice of London's Best New Attraction: Salma is rooting for the gorillas and who am I, something of a professional chimp in her company, to demur?
See you from our side of the enclosure at 6.
Alastair & Salma.
